I am 23, my husband is 27. We have been together for just under 6 years. We have never done anything to "prevent" pregnancy, it just never happened. Well, we have been wanting a baby for quite some time.....It just never happened....Well, we got married in December, and once I was insured we made a Dr appointment right away to see what was going on. I made an appointment with a regular Dr, and was referred to an OB for infertility care. We had our in-take appointment, which is lots of questions about both of us. She scheduled us for lots of lab tests, and we had another appointment for after our labs were back in so we could see what our treatment plan was going to be.
Our appointment was on Valentines day.....The Dr came in, and all she told us was our test results, which we were already given, and told me I need to lose 30lbs, and refused any treatment to me.
I was so devastated that she was so insensitive, and the way she acted towards us was something a couple should never have to feel with starting infertility care. We spoke with the head nurse about our concerns, and got our co-pay back! She said she would be getting us a second opinion.....I felt hopeful after speaking with her for a little bit, she made my tears disappear!! We left the office with some hope that we would be getting treatment soon!
About a week or so later, I received a phone call from Luanna.....She was so wonderful! She was a nurse at the other office where I would be receiving my second opinion. We talked for over a half hour about the process, and what she thought, and really truly gave me hope. Over the next month or so, I would call and make sure of what I was supposed to be doing, we had labs to do, and were to call and make an appointment once we are done with the labs!
I had my HSG test on Feb 28th. That was very painful, it took the Dr quite a few tries to get a clear "picture" to get through to my cervix, and had me move a couple times, and they wouldn't even let my husband sit in for support while inserting it, before the X-ray!! The lady was standing over me, and kept talking when all I wanted to do was lay there in silence while the Dr seemed to not know what he was doing!! I was frustrated!! Well, they took the X-rays, everything looked perfectly fine! No issues with my tubes, or uterus, or anything! I was relieved and excited!! My husband got to come in and see the pictures of my X-rays, he was very excited as well! We left the Dr happy, but I was very cranky, and crampy to the max!! I remember just wanting to go curl in a ball, and sleep! I felt so crampy, and also bad pain! But I was sure glad and happy it was over with, and that everything was clear!
My husband had had a high fever recently, and his first SA was not a good one, so we had to wait one month to get the new SA. We finally were able to take the SA in, and the results were really really great!!
In the mean time, I am using OPK's from CD12-CD20, and hoping for a smiley face! My very first month using them, I got a smiley face, and I was ecstatic, because I had used OPK's a long long time ago, and never had a positive one! I felt hopeful, we had timed intercourse, etc and then a couple weeks later, AF obviously made her appearance. Also, taking my progesterone blood lab on CD21, or 7 days after my smiley face.
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| Very First :) OPK!! |
I called the first couple days into April to make my second opinion appointment, and the first available appointment was April 21st! Not on my day off, and my appointment is about an hour away! Meaning I would have to miss work if I couldn't get the day off! I immediately requested for it, but spent the next 2 weeks anticipating if my time off would be approved! I was at 6 points at work, and if I had to call in, it would put me at 7 points, and well, at 8 points I get fired!! I felt so discouraged, and tested. Like I had to choose between my job, or trying to start a family!! Well, one week before my appointment, my time off got denied!! I was so upset!! I was not able to get the day off at all, so my husband and I talked about it, and we obviously made the decision that I was going to call in, and get another point at work!!
That week drug on! It felt like it took forever!! I just wanted Monday to be here already!! Monday finally came!! I had to go alone, as my appointment was at 10am, and my husband is sound asleep at that hour. I made it there, and finally found my way into the OBGYN/Fertility area. I waited for what seemed like forever!! When the Dr finally came in, she seemed as if she didn't know what I wanted! I let her know what was going on, and again, just like the last Dr, she refused me treatment until I lost 10lbs! She really wants 13, but will settle for 10! Now, that isn't really a lot, but it is almost like a blackmail thing to me! Like "we know what you want, but we aren't going to give it to you until you give us what we want, which is you losing weight!" I had the same feelings all over again!! But this time, I was alone, no husband there for support. I actually spoke up for myself, and we argued back and fourth! She seemed more personable than the last, and when all was said and done I didn't feel as mad as my first appointment. She said to email her when I lose the 10lbs, and she will have me come in for a pelvic exam, and then she will give me medication to help me ovulate, and we will go from there!! I almost want to skip the timed intercourse after getting medication, and go straight to IUI, but I know that is MUCH more stressful!!!
I have been SO overwhelmed and stressed out with dealing with this. I know in the end it will all be worth the struggle, and journey, but right now it is just down right difficult to handle!! The last 2 nights I have cried a whole great deal, due to other people announcing their pregnancies, and just the reality of what is really going on. I am SO thankful for my husband, and my family!! They have been so supportive, but it is sad because they don't know what it feels like, so they can't truly understand what I am going through, and it hurts them to see me hurting so bad, and they wish they had the words and the power to make me feel better, and that hurts me that they are hurting!! I just hope and wish and pray that my journey will soon be complete, and I just really hope that I will be a mommy soon!!
I want to thank everyone for supporting me and my husband Steven in our journey, and always being encouraging throughout this!! It means so much to know how many people are pulling for us to conceive a precious miracle!! <3 I am going to be blogging as much as I can, as it is seeming to be helping with my feelings a bit!!
